Term

Emotional regulation

also known as affect regulation

Medically reviewed by the Shrinkopedia editorial team, led by Shariq Refai, MD, MBA, FAPA.

5 min read · 1,221 words

Medically reviewed . Reviewed by a board-certified psychiatrist before publication.
Sourced from primary literature . DSM-5-TR, NICE, the American Psychiatric Association, the NIMH, Cochrane, peer-reviewed research.
Dated and kept current . Every entry shows when it was published, reviewed, and last updated.
Honest about uncertainty . Each entry carries an evidence-strength rating and a "what we know and what we don't" section.
Independent . No advertising, no affiliate revenue, no sponsored content.

Quick answer

Emotional regulation is the set of processes by which people influence which emotions they have, when they have them, and how they experience and express them. It isn't about suppressing emotions or staying calm at all times. It's a skill set, and it can be developed.

Definition

Emotional regulation refers to how a person shapes their emotional life: not just what they feel, but the intensity, the timing, and the way it's experienced and shown. It covers turning a feeling up as well as down, and it includes everyday, often automatic adjustments, not only deliberate effort.

The standard framework comes from the psychologist James Gross. His process model describes strategies that act at different points: situation selection, choosing what to put yourself in front of; attention deployment, where you place your focus; cognitive reappraisal, changing how you interpret a situation; and response modulation, adjusting the emotion once it's underway. Across studies, reappraisal tends to be more adaptive than suppression.

What it looks like

Naming a strong feeling, sitting with it, and choosing a response rather than reacting on impulse.
Reframing a setback as a hard event rather than proof of failure, which softens its sting.
Stepping away from a heated conversation to cool down, then returning to it.
A parent helping a young child calm down, lending regulation the child can't yet manage alone.

What people often confuse this with

Suppressing emotions. Regulation isn't pushing feelings down or hiding them. Suppression is one strategy, and usually a poorer one. Healthy regulation includes feeling emotions fully and letting them be expressed.

Always being calm. Well-regulated doesn't mean unruffled. It means emotions are workable and roughly proportionate, not absent. Strong feelings are part of a regulated emotional life.

A fixed trait. Emotional regulation is a skill set, not a fixed personality feature. It develops over time, and it can be strengthened with practice and support.

Reality check

Myth: Good emotional regulation means never getting upset.

Getting upset is normal and often appropriate. Regulation is about how a feeling is handled, not about preventing it. The goal isn't a flat emotional life.

Myth: The healthiest thing is to control or hold back what you feel.

Suppression tends to be one of the less effective strategies, and it can carry costs. Reappraisal, changing how you see a situation, generally works better than clamping down on the feeling.

Myth: Either you're a calm person or you're not.

Regulation isn't all-or-nothing, and it isn't fixed. Children build it gradually with help from caregivers, and adults can keep developing it. Difficulty here is common and workable, not a permanent trait.

What research says

Emotional regulation is a well-studied area in psychology, with Gross's process model as a widely used framework. Reappraisal is generally found to be more adaptive than suppression, though context matters and no single strategy is best everywhere.

Difficulties with emotional regulation, often called emotion dysregulation, cut across many conditions rather than belonging to one. They appear in mood and anxiety disorders, ADHD, PTSD, and borderline personality disorder, among others. Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) was built substantially around teaching regulation skills. The evidence is rated mixed because, while the framework and the therapies are well supported, emotional regulation is a broad construct measured in many different ways across studies.

What we know and what we don't know

What we know

Emotional regulation covers how people influence the intensity, timing, and expression of emotions.
Reappraisal generally tends to be more adaptive than suppression.
It's a skill set that can be developed, and DBT teaches it directly.

What we don't know

It's measured in many different ways, which makes findings harder to compare cleanly.
The best strategy depends heavily on context, and there's no single rule for every situation.
Why some people develop strong regulation skills and others struggle isn't fully explained.

Questions people ask

Is emotional regulation the same as suppressing emotions?

No. Suppression is one strategy, and it often backfires: the emotion persists internally and can leak out later. Regulation is the broader capacity to work with what you're feeling, which can include naming it, tolerating it, changing your relationship with it, or, when appropriate, changing the situation.

Can emotional regulation be learned?

Yes. Emotion regulation is one of the four skill modules in dialectical behavior therapy and is targeted directly in cognitive behavioral therapy for many conditions. It's a skill, not a personality trait, and it can develop over time.

Why do I lose control when I'm tired or stressed?

The brain systems that support regulation (particularly the prefrontal cortex) work less effectively under sleep deprivation, stress, hunger, and alcohol. Everyone regulates worse in those states. Prevention (sleep, food, structure) is more useful than trying to have more willpower in the moment.

Is poor emotional regulation always a mental health problem?

Not always. Difficulty regulating strong emotions is a feature of many mental health conditions (borderline PD, ADHD, PTSD, bipolar disorder), but it also occurs on its own and shifts over the lifespan. Persistent, disruptive dysregulation deserves attention regardless of a specific diagnosis.

What's the best way to build it?

Consistency across time is what changes it. Skills learned in therapy, practiced daily. Sleep, exercise, and structure. Reducing substances that worsen regulation. Getting help sooner rather than later when a condition is affecting the underlying capacity.

Key features

In practical terms, emotional regulation includes:

situation selection, steering toward or away from emotionally loaded situations
attention deployment, shifting focus, including distraction or refocusing
cognitive reappraisal, reinterpreting a situation to change its emotional impact
response modulation, adjusting the expression of an emotion once it has started
it works in both directions, dampening and also amplifying emotions
much of it runs automatically, not only through conscious effort

Sources

Gross, J. J. Research on the process model of emotion regulation.
American Psychological Association (APA). Literature on emotion regulation and dialectical behavior therapy.
National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH). Psychotherapies.
Clinical literature on emotion dysregulation across mental health conditions.

Read how Shrinkopedia builds and reviews its content.

How to cite this page

Short: Emotional regulation. Shrinkopedia, medically reviewed by Shariq Refai, MD, MBA. https://shrinkopedia.com/terms/emotional-regulation/
APA: Shrinkopedia. (2026, May 24). Emotional regulation. Medically reviewed by Shariq Refai, MD, MBA. https://shrinkopedia.com/terms/emotional-regulation/
MLA: "Emotional regulation." Shrinkopedia, 24 May 2026, https://shrinkopedia.com/terms/emotional-regulation/.

Click a citation to select it.

Medical disclaimer

Shrinkopedia is for education, not medical advice. It can't diagnose you, and it isn't a substitute for care from a licensed clinician. If managing emotions feels consistently overwhelming, a therapist can help you build these skills.

If you're in crisis or thinking about harming yourself, call or text 988 in the US to reach the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, or call 911.

See where this fits in the Atlas: how your mind works →

The Knowledge Path

Walk the connection from this entry outward.

1 TERM Emotional regulation (current)
2 HUB Hubs
3 SYMPTOM Symptoms
4 CONDITION Conditions
5 TREATMENT Treatments

The Knowledge Path is a curated walk. Every step is one decision away from the next.

Your next step in The Shrink Network

You are here: Shrinkopedia, the concept layer of The Shrink Network.

Understand the idea here first, then follow it to the property that takes it further.

Read a related concept →

Want to understand more first?

See the daily concept on ShrinkDaily: Emotion regulation .